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Is it bad being nice??

ink90 asked
So i liked this girl the moment i saw her at 1st instance. But later on came out to know that she was dating my friend. I stepped back and became friends with her, even tough i knew my friend was two-tyming her. i didn't bitch about it to her nor did i interfere in their relation. Slowly i stopped talking to her since things were getting complicated and i didn't want to be the root of the problem.
I had lost touch with them, till recently she came out from nowhere back again and started talking to me again. But then she was still going out with him and by this time she had broken up and patched up with him almost 4-5 times with the same reason. Now she was completely broken and i was being her emotional support, but i felt being used more rather than helping her out from the situation. It was just the moments went she felt down or needed some work to be done, she approached me. Or else im just a random guy for her and she keeps throwing her attitude and ignorance on me. Last night i just raged out on her for her being too selfish and just wanting her needs to be done. I feel bad about it, but at the same time i don't want to be someone's slave. I am lost, don't know what to do and where i stand ??
pls help
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BikiniTigre
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BikiniTigre answered Expert answer - Find more experts: click here!

Unfortunately, it sounds to me like you placed yourself squarely in the middle of the Friend Zone. While your efforts to be a friend are admirable, I don’t think they’re necessarily genuine. To stay in a friendship with this girl when you know she is in a relationship with your friend is, at best, a mistake.

If you want a friendship with this girl – a real friendship, not a precursor to a romantic relationship – then you need to set some boundaries with her. Tell her that you don’t want to just be a sounding board for her relationship problems. You want to be a friend all the time, not just when she’s having problems with him.

On the other hand, if you want a romantic relationship with this girl, then you need to tell her. Explain your feelings, and be honest with her. If she feels the same way, she will leave her current relationship to pursue it. If she doesn’t, you need to end this friendship. All you’re doing is hurting yourself, and putting expectations on this girl that she may not really be aware are there.

Good luck, ink90. Expert answer - Find more experts: click here!

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